Sunday, August 27, 2006

i'm having a day of trawling through old ideas and i can't believe how many bits of unfinsihed stories or notes about ideas that i've which i dont even remember writing. maybe while i was away someone swapped my ideas folder for theirs, although my handwriting looks quite familiar and of course in amongst it all there are some old ideas which i do remember, the dull ones of course.
mondays is my day in the studio and i miss my baby pickle in such a funny way, it is not that there is anything i want to tell him or show him or share with him, it is kind of like i am missing a physical sensation, just of there being a little being around me, maybe i am missing being so depended on, but at the same time i am feeling happy about having a day to myself and the inside of my head.
pickle and i went to the st.kilda library on friday. that was good even though it is not as good as the fitzroy library because it doesn't have any couches. there is something about a local library that makes me feel that i am skilled at accessing the good things that society has to offer me. i wonder if this is a skill i could list on my cv. i always borrow more books than i can read which is fun and even if i dont read them there is soemthing to look at during the blank morning stare of breakfast.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

reading the paper this morning i felt for a japanese man who was arrested for making over 30,00o silent calls to directory enquiries. maybe making silent calls to a public service could be new form of meditation. i have never tried meditiation but i probably should, because i have a lot of mind clutter to clear and often i can't stop thinking about stupid things one night i couldn't sleep because i was so full of regret that i'd picked the wrong colour pusher, and i got up the next morning determined to dye the pusher or look for a new one. and simultaneously alongside that stream of pointless annoying thought was a persisitent pestering about how much i dont want to be a nuclear family, but how hard it is now to change that. surely my brain has better things to do than think about pusher colours when there is so much to work on in the world right now. i shouldn't have read the newspaper. there are many important campaigns to be involved in but i am still tempted to start up my ban heterosexual marriage campaign. the gay community would feel so much less isolated and the state could concentrate on recognising more important things like native title.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

on the night of the world cup final we were sitting at an outdoor table of a pizza restaurant in jelsa, croatia, and a bird fell out of the sky, down past my arm in between my body and andy's (pickle was on his lap). it wasn't dead but i think it was dying.